Living & Dying Well | Practical Steps (Catechists)

Accompanying families through the hardest questions.

Catechists occupy a privileged place in parish life: trusted by families, close to the sacraments, and present at moments of real and profound vulnerability. End-of-life formation is not outside your ministry. Indeed, at times it may be at the heart of it.

Know the Church's basic teaching.

The Catholic tradition holds that we must never intentionally aim at the death of an innocent person, or shorten life, but neither are we obligated to pursue every possible medical intervention. The goal is not to extend life at all costs; that is idolatry and the example of martyrs and of Christ Himself push back against it. We are care for the whole person (body, soul, and relationships) until natural death. Physician-assisted killing is a violation of human dignity, not a mercy. But taking even very strong pain medication and choosing to live in certain ways where one foresees (but does not intend) that life may be shorter can be morally acceptable.

Be ready to name the fears that drive families toward bad decisions.

Many different kinds of research show that the top reasons people request physician-assisted killing have little or even nothing to do with physical pain. Rather, what drives these decisions is fear of being a burden, loss of dignity, and loss of control or autonomy. These are pastoral concerns. When you encounter families carrying these fears, you can offer a different vision: that suffering accepted with love is not waste, that dependence is not indignity, and that family and the broader community are called to joyfully carry burdens together. It is especially powerful when this can be done at the patient’s home, where most prefer to live out their final days.

Point families toward concrete tools.

Encourage every family you work with to complete a Catholic Health Care Directive and to designate a Life-Affirming Medical Proxy (LAMP). These documents ensure that Catholic values guide medical decisions even in a crisis. They are available in both English and Spanish through the Diocese of Trenton's Living and Dying Well resources.

Equip families to ask the right questions in a hospital.

If a family feels something is wrong in a medical setting, they have rights. They can request an ethics consultation. They can involve the hospital chaplain. They can contact the diocesan office. At a Catholic hospital, they can hold the institution accountable to the Ethical and Religious Directives. Let families know they are not alone and they do not have to simply defer to whatever a physician recommends or what the broader medical team or even the hospital itself may be pushing them toward.

Pray these questions into practice.

The prayers in the Living and Dying Well materials (the Memento Mori, the Prayer to Saint Joseph, the Suscipe of St. Ignatius, and more) are not just resources for the dying. They are formation tools for the living. Incorporate them into your classes, your sacramental prep sessions, and your prayer before and after sessions.